“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”  - Rumi                                                                                                                                                                 

I am passionate about working with couples. My style with couples is more direct and active, but my compassion, warmth and respect for your unique experience remains the same. Intimate relationships touch our deepest relational wounds. That’s why we can be overwhelmed with the pain they bring and often, at points, feel like giving up. When attended to with gentleness and compassion, these wounds can heal and we can experience a new level of connection and love - one which we couldn't have imagined. My hope is to help you heal and flourish as a couple, to help create a secure bond between you that will last. I believe there is nothing inherently wrong with you, that the challenges you are experiencing are an opportunity for a new quality of life – life with a deeper connection with yourselves and each other.

I enjoy working with couples who love each other but got trapped in a negative cycle of fighting or withdrawal and lost the emotional connection or the spark in their relationship.

 I am trained in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) and Gottman Method Couples Therapy, which are the two most well researched and effective approaches to couples therapy. I am also trained in RLT (Relational Life Therapy) - a powerful direct approach that can be helpful for couples who feel really stuck but ready to do intensive and deep work.

I love working with multicultural couples and I understand the complexity and specific challenges those couples face.

Please call me at 510 984 4883 any time for a free 15 minute phone consultation. You can also e-mail me at ilona@connectwithyourself.com